I'm not sure if I've mentioned on this blog that I am currently in a masters program. I started the week before my wedding (because I'm insane like that...) and have about another year+ to go in my studies before I will have obtained a Masters of Social Justice degree. One aspect of going back to school that I didn't really expect to get right away (if at all) was a new circle of friends. Our cohort clicked very quickly on an emotional level (most of us anyway) and many of us began identifying ourselves as a Tribe rather than a cohort very early on. This group of people has filled a need that I was experiencing on a very meaningful level for me and I am grateful to have them in this program with me.
This past weekend was a class weekend for me, and a few of our classmates were missing for various reasons. One in particular had some personal issues she was working out, and so I chose to send her a letter to let her know she'd been missed. Anna is passionate in every sense of the word. She isn't afraid to voice her opinions on issues of interest, and she can be very outspoken. Her strong personality unfortunately has gotten her in trouble at times, but I love her all the same and really did miss having her voice represented in our tribe this weekend.
Monday, January 31, 2011
Letter #27 - Sergio
Sergio was my grade four teacher. I do not remember the circumstances that made me want so desperately to be in his class, but I do remember the first day of school that year, going up to him so anxiously to see if I was in his class or not. I was elated when I found out my name was on his roster! Sergio was the teacher no one ever wanted to disappoint. One time we had a substitute, who we treated pretty poorly... and when Sergio returned he talked to us so quietly, and looked so sad... we were devastated. He didn't need to yell, he didn't need to threaten us with punishments, we just fessed up and apologised and truly felt awful. He was also the teacher who played guitar and would teach us these great songs like "In the Jungle" and "Lean On Me"
Grade four was the year my family discovered we would be moving to the Netherlands. During the spring, my parents left for two weeks for a go-see trip, and left me in Sergio's care the morning of their flight, crying my eyes out in the hallway. He sat out in the hall with me for a few minutes until I could get myself together, then gave me some individual things to work on so I would have some time to settle down before being expected to interact with the rest of my classmates.
As I mentioned when I began this blog, I come from a family of writers. When I was young my mum really encouraged me to write letters, especially when we moved to Rotterdam. I wrote to Sergio. He wrote back. We're still friends. In fact, Sergio & his wife attended my wedding last year (I was ecstatic).
Writing this letter to Sergio was a chance for me to express some thanks to him for being such an important part of my life. I also used it as a chance to send him a photo I had promised him months ago and haven't gotten around to sending yet. Writing to Sergio always brings on feelings of nostalgia and inspiration for me. When I thought I wanted to teach school, I knew I wanted to be like him in my teaching style. Being around Sergio makes me want to help and inspire others, which I am trying more and more to act on.
Grade four was the year my family discovered we would be moving to the Netherlands. During the spring, my parents left for two weeks for a go-see trip, and left me in Sergio's care the morning of their flight, crying my eyes out in the hallway. He sat out in the hall with me for a few minutes until I could get myself together, then gave me some individual things to work on so I would have some time to settle down before being expected to interact with the rest of my classmates.
As I mentioned when I began this blog, I come from a family of writers. When I was young my mum really encouraged me to write letters, especially when we moved to Rotterdam. I wrote to Sergio. He wrote back. We're still friends. In fact, Sergio & his wife attended my wedding last year (I was ecstatic).
Writing this letter to Sergio was a chance for me to express some thanks to him for being such an important part of my life. I also used it as a chance to send him a photo I had promised him months ago and haven't gotten around to sending yet. Writing to Sergio always brings on feelings of nostalgia and inspiration for me. When I thought I wanted to teach school, I knew I wanted to be like him in my teaching style. Being around Sergio makes me want to help and inspire others, which I am trying more and more to act on.
Friday, January 28, 2011
Letter #26 - Liz
My cousin Liz and I are about 2 weeks apart in age. Until I was in high school we never lived close to one another, and so even though we would see each other usually once or twice a year, and even though we would exchange cards, letters and gifts, I never felt like I really truly got to know her. During high school we were pretty much inseparable even though we didn't attend the same school. College pulled us apart as I stayed in state and Lizzie moved out of state, and then got married, taking her out of state more permanently. While I was happy for her to start married life and be so happy, I was bummed that she was far away again. We still write and call but not as much as I would like. We stood up in each others' weddings, but only get to see each other once every couple of years now as money and schedules don't allow us to travel much to see each other.
This week I sat down and did something I haven't done in a very long time... I wrote out a letter to Liz that consisted of more than just a line or two in a card. It brought back memories of contests we used to have of who could send the longest letter... inside jokes we would share in high school... games we used to play when we were young... conversations we've had since we've grown up and matured a bit beyond complaining about homework and brothers (I have one, she has four). I miss her a whole lot and it felt good to write the letter and feel like I was catching her up a bit. I hope this will prompt me to make a stronger and more frequent effort to stay in closer contact with her, because I really do miss having her as a constant in my life. That needs to come back. So does Lizzie :o(
This week I sat down and did something I haven't done in a very long time... I wrote out a letter to Liz that consisted of more than just a line or two in a card. It brought back memories of contests we used to have of who could send the longest letter... inside jokes we would share in high school... games we used to play when we were young... conversations we've had since we've grown up and matured a bit beyond complaining about homework and brothers (I have one, she has four). I miss her a whole lot and it felt good to write the letter and feel like I was catching her up a bit. I hope this will prompt me to make a stronger and more frequent effort to stay in closer contact with her, because I really do miss having her as a constant in my life. That needs to come back. So does Lizzie :o(
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Letter #25 - Mary
I have always had friends from different generations than my own. As I progressed through school, our moves ended up putting me ahead of my age group in school meaning I was usually the baby of the class (age-wise). The nature of my dad's career for most of my life constantly had me conversing with grown ups, and so age has just never really been a factor for me when it comes to feeling comfortable or who I gravitate toward in a friendship, etc.
Mary is one of my 'older' friends. Older as in she is older than me, but not OLD :o) Her 5 year old daughter is my goddaughter. Mary lived with her husband in Rotterdam during part of our time there, and got to know my mum. The two of them became very good friends, and I remember always loving when we'd get to spend time with them because they were fun, outgoing, didn't treat us like dumb kids, and were a cultural connection to 'home' for us (read: English speaking and knowledgeable about very important cultural icons like Kraft Dinner and Double Stuff Oreos) When Mary & her husband moved back to the US, I had no idea that life would not only continue to sustain our friendship, but that specifically my friendship with them would continue to grow and develop in ways I had never imagined.
Mary is an amazing woman. Her life rarely seems to go "as planned" and yet she is a champion at rolling with the punches. I have had the great blessing of being a part of her family's life over the last several years, and was so incredibly touched when they asked me if I would be a godmother to their daughter. That has brought us even closer together. When my family moved to Michigan, Mary was living in Indiana, and then Ohio. Both driving distance for a weekend trip, something I often took advantage of. Last year, they moved to North Carolina. I was bummed. Now they're no longer a quick weekend trip away. As I've kept in touch with Mary (we're both big social media users which is awesome for keeping tabs on each other!) I've really empathised with some of the struggles they've had in transitioning. Nothing hugely major, they got a great house, found a great school for their daughter, her husband seems to really be happy with his job (the reason for the move), they're closer to family, etc. But the small things keep coming up, and those are the ones I completely get. The community center isn't as cool as the last place, the grocery stores stock different options for their preferred locovore habits, the restaurants are different, the neighbours are different, and let's face it, sometimes you just crave a specialty beverage from that cafe down the street... except it's now in a different state. I get that. I get not being able to pick up the phone and make plans with a girlfriend anymore because she lives 10 hours away instead of 10 minutes, I get wishing that the guy at the library had the same disposition as the intern at your library "back home"
My letter to Mary brought a lot of those feelings of homesickness back for me. Homesickness for every place I've lived that isn't here. While for some that may seem like a really sad and wallowy place, for me it's always a place of comfort as well. I can wrap myself in the memories of the places and faces that aren't right by me anymore, and it always ends up sparking really great memories too. I hope that their move proves to be an even better adventure than past ones, and I know that in time it will be as much home to them as the last one, but in the meantime, I continue to try and be that piece of 'home' to help through the rough spots.
Mary is one of my 'older' friends. Older as in she is older than me, but not OLD :o) Her 5 year old daughter is my goddaughter. Mary lived with her husband in Rotterdam during part of our time there, and got to know my mum. The two of them became very good friends, and I remember always loving when we'd get to spend time with them because they were fun, outgoing, didn't treat us like dumb kids, and were a cultural connection to 'home' for us (read: English speaking and knowledgeable about very important cultural icons like Kraft Dinner and Double Stuff Oreos) When Mary & her husband moved back to the US, I had no idea that life would not only continue to sustain our friendship, but that specifically my friendship with them would continue to grow and develop in ways I had never imagined.
Mary is an amazing woman. Her life rarely seems to go "as planned" and yet she is a champion at rolling with the punches. I have had the great blessing of being a part of her family's life over the last several years, and was so incredibly touched when they asked me if I would be a godmother to their daughter. That has brought us even closer together. When my family moved to Michigan, Mary was living in Indiana, and then Ohio. Both driving distance for a weekend trip, something I often took advantage of. Last year, they moved to North Carolina. I was bummed. Now they're no longer a quick weekend trip away. As I've kept in touch with Mary (we're both big social media users which is awesome for keeping tabs on each other!) I've really empathised with some of the struggles they've had in transitioning. Nothing hugely major, they got a great house, found a great school for their daughter, her husband seems to really be happy with his job (the reason for the move), they're closer to family, etc. But the small things keep coming up, and those are the ones I completely get. The community center isn't as cool as the last place, the grocery stores stock different options for their preferred locovore habits, the restaurants are different, the neighbours are different, and let's face it, sometimes you just crave a specialty beverage from that cafe down the street... except it's now in a different state. I get that. I get not being able to pick up the phone and make plans with a girlfriend anymore because she lives 10 hours away instead of 10 minutes, I get wishing that the guy at the library had the same disposition as the intern at your library "back home"
My letter to Mary brought a lot of those feelings of homesickness back for me. Homesickness for every place I've lived that isn't here. While for some that may seem like a really sad and wallowy place, for me it's always a place of comfort as well. I can wrap myself in the memories of the places and faces that aren't right by me anymore, and it always ends up sparking really great memories too. I hope that their move proves to be an even better adventure than past ones, and I know that in time it will be as much home to them as the last one, but in the meantime, I continue to try and be that piece of 'home' to help through the rough spots.
Monday, January 24, 2011
Letter #24 - Colette
When I married my husband, I gained a sister-in-law. She has been married to Austin's brother for several years and is a very nice girl, but I barely know her. She's quiet and we mostly only see each other at larger family gatherings, so our typical conversations are short and fairly surface.
Over the years I have felt like we should be closer... especially now as we're family and all, but for all the excuses I haven't put much effort in on my part. Today I tried to take a step forward, and sent her a letter. It's short, not a whole lot to it, but I wished her a good week and let her know how glad I was to see her at all of the holiday get togethers.
We have very different personalities, so who knows how our relationship will develop, but I feel good about getting over some of my own insecurities enough to at least start making the effort. Time will tell.
Over the years I have felt like we should be closer... especially now as we're family and all, but for all the excuses I haven't put much effort in on my part. Today I tried to take a step forward, and sent her a letter. It's short, not a whole lot to it, but I wished her a good week and let her know how glad I was to see her at all of the holiday get togethers.
We have very different personalities, so who knows how our relationship will develop, but I feel good about getting over some of my own insecurities enough to at least start making the effort. Time will tell.
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Letter #23 - Tante Mary
I have never really gotten to know my grandparents very well. Moving around has taken me geographically far from them most of my life, and now I only have one who is still living. As a result, I don't know them nearly as well as I would have liked. I've always envied my husband who had all four of his grandparents until he was in his twenties.
On the flip side, I have had the blessing of getting to know some of my great aunts and uncles very well. When my family lived in the Netherlands, I was able to meet a lot of my fathers' extended family. One of these is my Tante (Aunt) Mary. Her husband passed away before we moved there so I never got to meet him, but she is a wonderful wonderful lady. We spent so much time with her, shopping, sitting chatting, drinking tea, etc. When I was able to take my husband with me to Europe to meet some of my friends & family, we spent lots of time with Tante Mary. She introduced Austin to stamppot, which is why I now have to make it regularly for him :o)
My note to Tante Mary included some photos of the kittens - she's a critter freak too :o) Her dog Rocky is 15 years old and acts like a puppy still. Tante Mary isn't much of a writer, but I know she enjoys hearing from us. I usually hear from her at my birthday and at Christmas, and I hope that life will allow us to go back and visit at least one more time before she's no longer with us...!
On the flip side, I have had the blessing of getting to know some of my great aunts and uncles very well. When my family lived in the Netherlands, I was able to meet a lot of my fathers' extended family. One of these is my Tante (Aunt) Mary. Her husband passed away before we moved there so I never got to meet him, but she is a wonderful wonderful lady. We spent so much time with her, shopping, sitting chatting, drinking tea, etc. When I was able to take my husband with me to Europe to meet some of my friends & family, we spent lots of time with Tante Mary. She introduced Austin to stamppot, which is why I now have to make it regularly for him :o)
My note to Tante Mary included some photos of the kittens - she's a critter freak too :o) Her dog Rocky is 15 years old and acts like a puppy still. Tante Mary isn't much of a writer, but I know she enjoys hearing from us. I usually hear from her at my birthday and at Christmas, and I hope that life will allow us to go back and visit at least one more time before she's no longer with us...!
Letter #22 - Irene
I used to date this guy who had the most amazing neighbours. When we broke up, I was really sad that it also ended my relationship with his neighbours. Kind of odd, but that became something I thought about in future relationships... I actually became more guarded with people like that who were a part of my boyfriends' lives, until I felt like the relationship was really gonna last. My husband's family has awesome neighbours. One of them is this wonderfully sweet woman named Irene (which in and of itself is awesome since that was my grandma's name) Anytime we see her she always waves us over for a few minutes of conversation. She's made us cookies, sent us cards, and even gave me a crystal angel once when I ran into her after having received some really bad news.
This week I decided to send her a note letting her know we were thinking of her. I have no idea how old she is, and while she seems in pretty good health for her age (she still lives on her own just fine) but if life has taught me anything, it's that you can't count on anything. So this week, Irene will get a note. I hope it brings some happiness to her day when she gets it, and who knows, maybe we'll get a note back (she sent us the sweetest Christmas card!)
This week I decided to send her a note letting her know we were thinking of her. I have no idea how old she is, and while she seems in pretty good health for her age (she still lives on her own just fine) but if life has taught me anything, it's that you can't count on anything. So this week, Irene will get a note. I hope it brings some happiness to her day when she gets it, and who knows, maybe we'll get a note back (she sent us the sweetest Christmas card!)
365 Letters - Reflections
When I began this project earlier this month, I did expect that communication with my friends and family would improve over time. I expected that from time to time I would get a letter in response to ones I sent. What I didn't expect was the number of responses and thanks I've received. I posted one of my blog posts on facebook only to have the recipient of the letter see it, read the post and thank me profusely for my kind words, and express how perfect my timing had been in her life... and she hadn't even received the letter yet! This week I received a series of text messages from one of my letter recipients telling me how emotionally moved she had been by the note I sent her, and how grateful she was that we were friends and that I had been thinking of her and felt the need to send that note.
It's been a cool experience so far, much more so than I had expected, and I am so glad I came up with the idea and haven't given up on it yet!
It's been a cool experience so far, much more so than I had expected, and I am so glad I came up with the idea and haven't given up on it yet!
Letter #21 - Madeline
One of my letters this week went to Madeline, who is the wife of a former colleague of my dad's. When we first moved to MI, Madeline was someone I saw pretty regularly at church events, and she and my mum were good friends. When I decided to go to MSU, Madeline was excited to fill the role of my "school mom" and did a great job. She would keep tabs on me, send me care packages, etc. During my time at MSU, I felt close to her, even if we didn't see each other more than usually about once a week at church (sometimes more). My time there was also a time of stress and transition (some good, some bad) for her family, so in some ways I think we could have been much closer, but life got in the way. Madeline worked for a seniors home, and our church group activities often included spending time with her residents. I usually looked more forward to these to see the smile it brought to Madeline's face than I did for the sake of the seniors... (not that the seniors weren't important too, of course!)
After I graduated and moved away, Madeline became one of those faces I missed a lot. I got to a point where I feel like I have no idea what is going on in her life anymore, and I don't really like that feeling. So I wrote her a note, sent her a few wedding photos (she wasn't able to make the wedding due to work), and am hoping it will renew our communication for the future!
After I graduated and moved away, Madeline became one of those faces I missed a lot. I got to a point where I feel like I have no idea what is going on in her life anymore, and I don't really like that feeling. So I wrote her a note, sent her a few wedding photos (she wasn't able to make the wedding due to work), and am hoping it will renew our communication for the future!
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Letter #20 - Jose
I've been super busy the last few days so I haven't had a chance to post on my letters. Here's to catching up.
The other day I was reminiscing about Mexico and it made me miss my dear friend Jose... so I sat down and wrote him a note. Jose is one of those friends who I fell instantly in love with (platonically speaking). He was one of the executives in my seminars and the more we talked, the more I felt like we had known each other forever. He's the kind of friend that makes me wonder if there isn't something to the reincarnation idea... it feels like I would have known him in past lives. We share a lot of life philosophies and world outlooks and anytime one of us was in each others' town there would be delicious food, wonderful conversation, and general awesomeness.
In my old job I could usually count on at least one trip to Mexico a year, and Jose could usually count on at least one Detroit trip a year, meaning we'd usually be able to squeeze in a few days to hang out a year. Since I lost my job, no more Mexico. Jose also has moved on, so no more Detroit. It sucks.
Writing to Jose allowed me to remember all of the awesome times I had traveling to Mexico. One of my first trips included a private guided tour of the Anthropology Museum and the Tituhacan Pyramids. Super cool.
The other day I was reminiscing about Mexico and it made me miss my dear friend Jose... so I sat down and wrote him a note. Jose is one of those friends who I fell instantly in love with (platonically speaking). He was one of the executives in my seminars and the more we talked, the more I felt like we had known each other forever. He's the kind of friend that makes me wonder if there isn't something to the reincarnation idea... it feels like I would have known him in past lives. We share a lot of life philosophies and world outlooks and anytime one of us was in each others' town there would be delicious food, wonderful conversation, and general awesomeness.
In my old job I could usually count on at least one trip to Mexico a year, and Jose could usually count on at least one Detroit trip a year, meaning we'd usually be able to squeeze in a few days to hang out a year. Since I lost my job, no more Mexico. Jose also has moved on, so no more Detroit. It sucks.
Writing to Jose allowed me to remember all of the awesome times I had traveling to Mexico. One of my first trips included a private guided tour of the Anthropology Museum and the Tituhacan Pyramids. Super cool.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Letter #19 - Margaret
Today I decided to pair my letter with a gift I've been meaning to send to my aunt. Auntie Marg is one of the van Rossums, and super awesome. She was the one who started the work on my wedding gown (and would have finished it if life hadn't exploded). We share a love of cooking, and she is always giving me new ideas to try in the kitchen. I don't really write to her, and as I started the letter I was suddenly really insecure that I wouldn't be able to think of anything interesting to say, or that anything I wrote would come off as lame or forced. Before I knew it, I had written the entire inside of the notecard and the back of it as well.
Auntie Marg and I also share a love of crafting. While we express ourselves with different mediums, we have had some great creative conversations, and are always eager to see the new projects the other is working on. In fact, I'm excited to show her a new project I just finished that I'm considering adding to my Shutterbug crafty repertoire.
Writing to Auntie Marg made me miss her, and miss my cousins (her kids) quite a bit. Maybe my husband and I can take a long weekend sometime this year and go visit them.
Auntie Marg and I also share a love of crafting. While we express ourselves with different mediums, we have had some great creative conversations, and are always eager to see the new projects the other is working on. In fact, I'm excited to show her a new project I just finished that I'm considering adding to my Shutterbug crafty repertoire.
Writing to Auntie Marg made me miss her, and miss my cousins (her kids) quite a bit. Maybe my husband and I can take a long weekend sometime this year and go visit them.
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Letter #18 - Brenda
This week I have been feeling very homesick for Europe. I think this is in part because this project forces me to spend a lot of time thinking about the people in my life, which of course includes all of the people from that time in my life as well. I also have been chatting with a friend of mine who is soon to become an expat as she moves her family to Brazil, and that has had me very focused on my family's experiences. This brought me to Brenda for today's letter.
Brenda and her husband were expats living in Germany while my family was in the Netherlands. They were also church members, which is how our lives became intertwined. I was never excited to travel to Germany when we lived there. Partly because of my own cultural biases (I was living in one of the most devastated cities of WWII... those wounds haven't quite healed in most people), and partly because there were never any kids our age, usually a heavy concentration of older people who didn't speak much or any English, and it was BORING for my brother and I to be on those trips. Brenda and her husband gave us a reason to look forward to going there. When mom and dad would announce a trip to Germany, our first question was "are Brenda & Meredith going to be there?"
Writing to Brenda allowed me to remember many happy times spent with them, at camps, in their home, shopping at the American Stores on base where they worked... Mum and I were lucky enough to spend some time with them last year at our church's world conference, and so I was also able to reflect on those conversations. Brenda has a warm and inviting spirit. She is very motherly, and quite elegant. She is someone who will always make me feel at home, because we were lucky enough to share the incredible experience of living outside of our own culture and language, and learning to see the world in a whole new light. Granted we went through these experiences as two very different people in two very different places in our lives, but we still share the core of that experience, which is something I share with fewer and fewer people in my life as I've become more "geographically stable" as I like to call it.
Brenda and her husband were expats living in Germany while my family was in the Netherlands. They were also church members, which is how our lives became intertwined. I was never excited to travel to Germany when we lived there. Partly because of my own cultural biases (I was living in one of the most devastated cities of WWII... those wounds haven't quite healed in most people), and partly because there were never any kids our age, usually a heavy concentration of older people who didn't speak much or any English, and it was BORING for my brother and I to be on those trips. Brenda and her husband gave us a reason to look forward to going there. When mom and dad would announce a trip to Germany, our first question was "are Brenda & Meredith going to be there?"
Writing to Brenda allowed me to remember many happy times spent with them, at camps, in their home, shopping at the American Stores on base where they worked... Mum and I were lucky enough to spend some time with them last year at our church's world conference, and so I was also able to reflect on those conversations. Brenda has a warm and inviting spirit. She is very motherly, and quite elegant. She is someone who will always make me feel at home, because we were lucky enough to share the incredible experience of living outside of our own culture and language, and learning to see the world in a whole new light. Granted we went through these experiences as two very different people in two very different places in our lives, but we still share the core of that experience, which is something I share with fewer and fewer people in my life as I've become more "geographically stable" as I like to call it.
Monday, January 17, 2011
Letter #17 - Airen
As many people as I know, today I actually had a hard time thinking who I felt like writing to. It was an interesting experience for me, because usually when I decide I need to send a note to someone, it's pretty easy to pick someone out quickly. Today I thought and thought all day. A few times I even went so far as to put the stationary in front of me with a pen, and nothing would come. Finally I decided to try something. I closed my eyes and just focused on my breath as I meditated for a moment. Almost immediately, the face of my friend Airen entered my mind. So Airen it was!
Airen and I met via my husband's network of musician friends. She used to be married to a guy he performs with sometimes, and she and I quickly became friends. Airen and I run with very different circles. She's a rock 'n' roll biker chick, and I'm well, not. We do, however, share views on many things in life, and we share a passion for photography and for cooking. I had the privilege of photographing her wedding. We also share a passion for yoga, though I hate to say I haven't been in probably a year... which I hate. She is a true free spirit and I just love her.
Writing to Airen made me reflect on the artistic side of my life. Whenever I hang out with her I always feel inspired to just go out somewhere with my camera and shoot until I run out of disc space. I hardly ever get the chance to do so anymore... rather, I hardly ever make the time to do so... another thing I need to improve about myself.
I hope my card finds her in good spirits, and that she acts on the request I included :o)
Airen and I met via my husband's network of musician friends. She used to be married to a guy he performs with sometimes, and she and I quickly became friends. Airen and I run with very different circles. She's a rock 'n' roll biker chick, and I'm well, not. We do, however, share views on many things in life, and we share a passion for photography and for cooking. I had the privilege of photographing her wedding. We also share a passion for yoga, though I hate to say I haven't been in probably a year... which I hate. She is a true free spirit and I just love her.
Writing to Airen made me reflect on the artistic side of my life. Whenever I hang out with her I always feel inspired to just go out somewhere with my camera and shoot until I run out of disc space. I hardly ever get the chance to do so anymore... rather, I hardly ever make the time to do so... another thing I need to improve about myself.
I hope my card finds her in good spirits, and that she acts on the request I included :o)
Sunday, January 16, 2011
Letter #16 - Susie Q
This letter went out to another BTS friend - Sue. Sue was another person I didn't really start to get to know until later in the week, and even at that point not all that well. She knew I was into photography and invited me to come visit her in Wisconsin some fall when the colours were at their peak so I could get some good shots to add to my collections... I didn't think much of it, but then on a whim, Austin & I decided to take her up on her offer and drove all the way up to Door County (so far one of the prettiest counties in the country, that I've seen at least!) and spent some time with her. It was an awesome trip, and we had sooo much fun with her! She and her boyfriend have also been to visit us once down here since then, and we try to keep in touch as best we can.
Writing to Susie immediately brought to mind images from our trip there... brilliant fall colours, fresh autumn air and bright warm fall sun on walks through the woods and through cute little towns. It also allowed me to spend some time remembering our lovely evening chats. Sue is a sweet, sweet lady, and a wonderful hostess. She has had many challenges in her life, and sometimes I think the hugeness of her heart gets her in trouble (as many of us sensitive types can relate to), but she is kind and loving and I am always glad to hear from her.
I hope that this year brings her resolution to some of the questions she's had of life, and I hope that our paths cross again soon. Who knows, WI isn't really *that* far away... maybe we can do a 2011 fall trip again!
Writing to Susie immediately brought to mind images from our trip there... brilliant fall colours, fresh autumn air and bright warm fall sun on walks through the woods and through cute little towns. It also allowed me to spend some time remembering our lovely evening chats. Sue is a sweet, sweet lady, and a wonderful hostess. She has had many challenges in her life, and sometimes I think the hugeness of her heart gets her in trouble (as many of us sensitive types can relate to), but she is kind and loving and I am always glad to hear from her.
I hope that this year brings her resolution to some of the questions she's had of life, and I hope that our paths cross again soon. Who knows, WI isn't really *that* far away... maybe we can do a 2011 fall trip again!
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Letter #15 - Oma
I hate to confess, I am not always the best granddaughter. I love my Oma dearly, don't get me wrong, but I'm really bad at keeping in touch with her. We haven't lived very close to her for most of my life, which means the best I can do most of the time is write or call... neither of which I do very often.
Today I decided to do better at that, so I started by sending her a letter. My Oma is awesome. She's Dutch by birth and immigrated to Canada when my dad was three years old. She's hilarious and a great cook... I have yet to master her soup making skills! She's very religious but in an oh-so-Dutch was :o) Anyone who meets her instantly understands my and my dad's sense of humour much better. She once spent about 30 minutes telling me about her 'new boyfriend'. When she asked if I wanted to see a photo, she pulled a picture of the Pope out of her wallet. She's not catholic, or senile. It was hilarious.
If anyone reading this is lucky enough to still have living grandparents, send them a note, give them a call, or go visit them this week. Oma's the last living grandparent I have, and I need to appreciate her better while that's still true!
Today I decided to do better at that, so I started by sending her a letter. My Oma is awesome. She's Dutch by birth and immigrated to Canada when my dad was three years old. She's hilarious and a great cook... I have yet to master her soup making skills! She's very religious but in an oh-so-Dutch was :o) Anyone who meets her instantly understands my and my dad's sense of humour much better. She once spent about 30 minutes telling me about her 'new boyfriend'. When she asked if I wanted to see a photo, she pulled a picture of the Pope out of her wallet. She's not catholic, or senile. It was hilarious.
If anyone reading this is lucky enough to still have living grandparents, send them a note, give them a call, or go visit them this week. Oma's the last living grandparent I have, and I need to appreciate her better while that's still true!
Letter #14 - Katie
Moving always comes with some less, no matter how exciting the move may be. One thing I've really missed since I got married and moved out of my parents' house is just having other people around. Being unemployed and a single vehicle family, I now spend most days alone at home until Austin gets home. We have neighbours of course, but are not really on a "let's hang out" level with any of them.
Because of this, I decided to send a note to one of my old neighbours. Katie lives across the street from my parents. She has been the perfect neighbour to my family. She's this fiercely independent woman with two daughters and an incredible ability to just handle anything - good or bad. She's helped us with everything from lending us a cup of sugar, to pet sitting, to helping us when my mum was really sick. We've been so blessed with her friendship, and I really do miss not running into her out in the yard or seeing her when she stops by to chat for a few minutes. I keep hoping maybe we'll be able to establish a similar relationship with our neighbours, but we're not quite there yet.
Because of this, I decided to send a note to one of my old neighbours. Katie lives across the street from my parents. She has been the perfect neighbour to my family. She's this fiercely independent woman with two daughters and an incredible ability to just handle anything - good or bad. She's helped us with everything from lending us a cup of sugar, to pet sitting, to helping us when my mum was really sick. We've been so blessed with her friendship, and I really do miss not running into her out in the yard or seeing her when she stops by to chat for a few minutes. I keep hoping maybe we'll be able to establish a similar relationship with our neighbours, but we're not quite there yet.
Letter #13 - Allison
Today was a sick day, which meant I logged a lot of time on the couch not doing a whole lot. While I did get quite a bit of homework done, I also took a break to do some writing.
I've mentioned this week that there are a few kids I've taken to over the last couple of years. Today I decided to write to another one of them - Allison. Allison's mom was a colleague of my mum's for awhile, and the two of them became good friends. I've known their family since before both Allison and her older brother were born.
As I've watched Allison grow up, I have observed a beautiful soul develop. She's a sweet kid who loves to play princess and dinosaurs with equal passions. The relationship she has with her brother reminds me a lot of my brother and I when we were their ages. I'm very fond of both of them, and have been lucky enough to babysit for them on a few occasions. It's really been cool to watch Allison slowly come out of her shell when she's around me. Kind of testing the waters to see if I'll judge what she says or does, and gradually becoming more and more comfortable until her entire personality shines brightly. I don't get to see her very often, but I do try to keep in touch a bit, and always enjoy the times we do get to spend together!
I've mentioned this week that there are a few kids I've taken to over the last couple of years. Today I decided to write to another one of them - Allison. Allison's mom was a colleague of my mum's for awhile, and the two of them became good friends. I've known their family since before both Allison and her older brother were born.
As I've watched Allison grow up, I have observed a beautiful soul develop. She's a sweet kid who loves to play princess and dinosaurs with equal passions. The relationship she has with her brother reminds me a lot of my brother and I when we were their ages. I'm very fond of both of them, and have been lucky enough to babysit for them on a few occasions. It's really been cool to watch Allison slowly come out of her shell when she's around me. Kind of testing the waters to see if I'll judge what she says or does, and gradually becoming more and more comfortable until her entire personality shines brightly. I don't get to see her very often, but I do try to keep in touch a bit, and always enjoy the times we do get to spend together!
Friday, January 14, 2011
Letter #12 - Seth
Tonight's letter is going to another former housemate. I met Seth through a mutual friend while I was doing my undergrad. We instantly connected and I was thrilled when he chose MSU for his grad program, meaning he was moving to Michigan, and better yet, into our house!
Seth is an incredible musical talent. In fact, he's the one who conducted an amazing feat just this past Christmas (click here for video). I loved getting to plan music for worship services with him. He also understood me on every nerd level... we share many nerd loves, and a deep appreciation for the sheer genius of all things Whedon.
I'm finding that over the course of this project, writing the letters will often focus me on a certain time. Some letters get me reflecting on present stuff, others allow me to consider the future, while others still (like this one) let me soak in memories of times past. Seth has long since moved away from Michigan, and I've gotten to see him a few times since, but I still miss him bunches, and look forward to the next time life brings our paths together!
Seth is an incredible musical talent. In fact, he's the one who conducted an amazing feat just this past Christmas (click here for video). I loved getting to plan music for worship services with him. He also understood me on every nerd level... we share many nerd loves, and a deep appreciation for the sheer genius of all things Whedon.
I'm finding that over the course of this project, writing the letters will often focus me on a certain time. Some letters get me reflecting on present stuff, others allow me to consider the future, while others still (like this one) let me soak in memories of times past. Seth has long since moved away from Michigan, and I've gotten to see him a few times since, but I still miss him bunches, and look forward to the next time life brings our paths together!
Letter #11 - Montana
It seems inevitable that some letters will inspire who I will write to next over the course of this project. Jeri's letter inspired me to write to one of the kids I've taken to.
Montana is the daughter of one of our old babysitters. When I was about 6, her mom would spend hours reading to use, playing with us and speaking French with us (we were in French Immersion). By the time Montana was born, geography had separated our families so it wasn't until she was about ten that we finally got to meet.
Turns out Montana is a lot like me at her age (just a bit more introverted) and an avid reader. I decided to take a page from Jeri's book (pun not entirely intended) and send her some of the books I had loved so much at that age. Now we exchange letters a few times a year, and I was thrilled to have her and her family attend my wedding last year. The letter I wrote allowed me to think about what a cool kid she is. Having known her mom so long and getting so see what a great daughter she ended up with... it makes me imagine what my kids might be like someday (for those of you wanting to read into that, no we are not working on parenthood quite yet!) I hope I'm lucky enough to end up with a kid like Montana... and I look forward to continuing to grow my relationship with her!
Montana is the daughter of one of our old babysitters. When I was about 6, her mom would spend hours reading to use, playing with us and speaking French with us (we were in French Immersion). By the time Montana was born, geography had separated our families so it wasn't until she was about ten that we finally got to meet.
Turns out Montana is a lot like me at her age (just a bit more introverted) and an avid reader. I decided to take a page from Jeri's book (pun not entirely intended) and send her some of the books I had loved so much at that age. Now we exchange letters a few times a year, and I was thrilled to have her and her family attend my wedding last year. The letter I wrote allowed me to think about what a cool kid she is. Having known her mom so long and getting so see what a great daughter she ended up with... it makes me imagine what my kids might be like someday (for those of you wanting to read into that, no we are not working on parenthood quite yet!) I hope I'm lucky enough to end up with a kid like Montana... and I look forward to continuing to grow my relationship with her!
Letter #10 - Jeri
This afternoon I finished writing a letter to a woman who has been a part of my life since I was four years old. Jeri's husband was a classmate of my fathers' when he was completing his Masters' of Religion degree.
Jeri is a smart, funny, clever lady with a sharp wit and a great smile. She's always embodied the "cool aunt" stereotype for me. When my family moved to the Netherlands, I was entering the oh-so-delicate pre-teen years (I have since decided that it's the pre-teens who are the real terrors... full blown teens are already beginning to mellow...) To this day, I do not know what inspired her to do so, but Jeri took me under her wing. She knew that I liked to read, and so she would send me books she would find at this amazing used bookstore in her town. While I became fluent in Dutch by the end of our time there, I still read mostly English books. Books in general were pretty expensive over there, and English books were even pricier - when you could find a store that carried them! Jeri had a knack for sending the exact kinds of books I would love, and I spent hours losing myself in the stories.
I know I sent her thank you notes at the time, but they were strictly for the books. Today, I got to thank her for what was behind the books. Jeri was a role model for me, even if I didn't get it at the time. In my letter, I got to tell her how I've recently been able to pay her kindness forward to some pre-teens in my life. I hope that my influence on them can be every bit as positive as Jeri's was on me.
Jeri is a smart, funny, clever lady with a sharp wit and a great smile. She's always embodied the "cool aunt" stereotype for me. When my family moved to the Netherlands, I was entering the oh-so-delicate pre-teen years (I have since decided that it's the pre-teens who are the real terrors... full blown teens are already beginning to mellow...) To this day, I do not know what inspired her to do so, but Jeri took me under her wing. She knew that I liked to read, and so she would send me books she would find at this amazing used bookstore in her town. While I became fluent in Dutch by the end of our time there, I still read mostly English books. Books in general were pretty expensive over there, and English books were even pricier - when you could find a store that carried them! Jeri had a knack for sending the exact kinds of books I would love, and I spent hours losing myself in the stories.
I know I sent her thank you notes at the time, but they were strictly for the books. Today, I got to thank her for what was behind the books. Jeri was a role model for me, even if I didn't get it at the time. In my letter, I got to tell her how I've recently been able to pay her kindness forward to some pre-teens in my life. I hope that my influence on them can be every bit as positive as Jeri's was on me.
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Letter #9 - Ylva
Today's letter had made me incredibly homesick. One of our old babysitters asked me awhile ago if I would mind sending her one of my wedding photos, and today seemed like the day to do it. Writing the letter to go along with it instantly transported me through space and time to our home in Rotterdam, sitting on the floor in my room (even back then my desk was rarely clear enough to function... she says sitting on the couch typing this because her desk is currently not even reachable...) working on whatever.
Ylva was one of those babysitters who made us actually suggest our folks go out for a night because we wanted her to come over. She would play with us, watch movies with us, help us work on our Dutch, play with our cat (R.I.P. Domino!), take us out shopping, swimming or to the playground... downtown to the really cool library, grocery shopping, to the pet store to look at the rabbits (which we eventually got one... and learned that we prefer not to have rodents as pets as they are far too much effort!) Her family lived right down the street from us and all went to our church, so a lot of times Ylva would even have us come to her house where we would watch wrestling with her family, play with their seemingly endless family of hamsters, or watch her mom work on whatever project she had in her hands at the time.
As I grew older and began babysitting I tried to model my style after Ylva's. She had always treated us like grown ups instead of dumb little kids. She would have conversations with us, really interact with us and care about what we had to say or wanted to do. She was also good at keeping us in line. Being cool didn't mean not making us follow the rules. Even if she didn't agree with all of the rules, she always made sure we followed what our parents wanted us to do, and she did it with love. She knew our likes, our dislikes, our friends, our bad habits. When I sat for kids I would try to establish that same spirit with them. I love kids and so it's pretty easy to just hang out with them. The important part (which Ylva excelled at) was to also remember to be that influencing source of authority (in a good way) so that kids can learn right from wrong and learn how to operate within the society they're in.
Writing to Ylva made me reflect on all these things, and still get homesick for the life I lived then... I know for sure I'll go back and visit many more times before my life is over, but I wonder if I'll ever be lucky enough to go live there again and share that part of my history and culture with my family?
-----
Ylva was one of those babysitters who made us actually suggest our folks go out for a night because we wanted her to come over. She would play with us, watch movies with us, help us work on our Dutch, play with our cat (R.I.P. Domino!), take us out shopping, swimming or to the playground... downtown to the really cool library, grocery shopping, to the pet store to look at the rabbits (which we eventually got one... and learned that we prefer not to have rodents as pets as they are far too much effort!) Her family lived right down the street from us and all went to our church, so a lot of times Ylva would even have us come to her house where we would watch wrestling with her family, play with their seemingly endless family of hamsters, or watch her mom work on whatever project she had in her hands at the time.
As I grew older and began babysitting I tried to model my style after Ylva's. She had always treated us like grown ups instead of dumb little kids. She would have conversations with us, really interact with us and care about what we had to say or wanted to do. She was also good at keeping us in line. Being cool didn't mean not making us follow the rules. Even if she didn't agree with all of the rules, she always made sure we followed what our parents wanted us to do, and she did it with love. She knew our likes, our dislikes, our friends, our bad habits. When I sat for kids I would try to establish that same spirit with them. I love kids and so it's pretty easy to just hang out with them. The important part (which Ylva excelled at) was to also remember to be that influencing source of authority (in a good way) so that kids can learn right from wrong and learn how to operate within the society they're in.
Writing to Ylva made me reflect on all these things, and still get homesick for the life I lived then... I know for sure I'll go back and visit many more times before my life is over, but I wonder if I'll ever be lucky enough to go live there again and share that part of my history and culture with my family?
-----
for those interested in viewing photos from the Netherlands, here are two albums from my two trips back to visit:
Eurotrip 2008 Travel Log (with some photos)
Eurotrip 2008 Photo Book
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Letter #8 - Sam
I have known Sam since I was a freshman in college. He was one of my first friends there and has stayed someone I keep close in my heart ever since. A group of us used to meet for lunch on Thursdays, every single week and Sam & I were almost always the first two to arrive, so we would save tables for everyone else and spend the time catching up with each other while we waited. We became housemates for awhile and Sam was always around to chat with, complain about class schedules to, to cook with or eat with (we both love to be in the kitchen!)... etc etc. When Sam moved out I really missed having him around.
Writing my letter to Sam brought me right back to the kitchen... me trying in vain to only cook for one (he was great at helping me finish off my leftovers... I can only repeat the same meal so many times before I would just rather not eat at all!) and Sam either pitching in, looking on, or leaning in the doorway making conversation. It was a great experience, being able to let my mind focus on such great memories.
There is a church event coming up next month and I am hoping that he will be there and that we will have a chance to chat. The last time I was supposed to see him he had a death in the family, so we didn't end up connecting. I close this entry heading to the kitchen to make dinner for my husband and I, but knowing that Sam will be in my head, leaning against the doorway :o)
Writing my letter to Sam brought me right back to the kitchen... me trying in vain to only cook for one (he was great at helping me finish off my leftovers... I can only repeat the same meal so many times before I would just rather not eat at all!) and Sam either pitching in, looking on, or leaning in the doorway making conversation. It was a great experience, being able to let my mind focus on such great memories.
There is a church event coming up next month and I am hoping that he will be there and that we will have a chance to chat. The last time I was supposed to see him he had a death in the family, so we didn't end up connecting. I close this entry heading to the kitchen to make dinner for my husband and I, but knowing that Sam will be in my head, leaning against the doorway :o)
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Letter #7 - Kris
I'm not sure if the mail truck has been to our place yet or not, but whether it makes today's mail or tomorrow's, the letter I just finished writing is going to my friend Kris. I have known Kris for about15 years I think now, and she is, by definition, awesome. We met at a church camp in the UK and ever since spending that week together I greatly look forward to any event where I know our paths will cross. Kris is vivacious, caring, compassionate, strong and stubborn (usually in all the right ways!). She is someone who is not afraid to speak out against injustices, and is wonderful at confronting loved ones with love and compassion if she is concerned about them. We have shared in camps, worship services, meals and just general chit chatting over the years and I have grown to respect her deeply. She has been a mentor of sorts to me, someone who fiercely respects confidentiality, and who excels at helping others problem solve and learn to share their burdens with others.
Writing my letter this afternoon allowed me to reflect on one of the last times I can recall having the chance to spend some one-on-one time with Kris (which is a rare gift, she is an extremely busy lady!) we had lunch together and she helped me talk through some stress points I had been carrying around with me for a few months at that point. Her ability to not only approach the topic in a non-threatening way, but also to help me remember that I didn't have to carry all that weight on my own was invaluable to me at the time. As I wrote my letter I was flooded with respect and love for her, even though the words I wrote were far more mundane (catching her up on my life since we last connected, inviting her and her husband to try and make time for a trip to visit this year, etc).
We all have people in our lives who play very important roles, and even though Kris and I may not chat every night on the phone, or even every week... she is someone I will always look up to and admire.
Writing my letter this afternoon allowed me to reflect on one of the last times I can recall having the chance to spend some one-on-one time with Kris (which is a rare gift, she is an extremely busy lady!) we had lunch together and she helped me talk through some stress points I had been carrying around with me for a few months at that point. Her ability to not only approach the topic in a non-threatening way, but also to help me remember that I didn't have to carry all that weight on my own was invaluable to me at the time. As I wrote my letter I was flooded with respect and love for her, even though the words I wrote were far more mundane (catching her up on my life since we last connected, inviting her and her husband to try and make time for a trip to visit this year, etc).
We all have people in our lives who play very important roles, and even though Kris and I may not chat every night on the phone, or even every week... she is someone I will always look up to and admire.
Monday, January 10, 2011
Letter #6 - Wendi
Wendi's letter was a search & rescue attempt of sorts. Wendi was a friend from our church family camp and could very well have ended up being a part of the Cube Squad (my super awesome photography team at camp) who simply stopped coming to camp. The first year I thought maybe life had just gotten too busy, maybe they couldn't get the time off work or afford to be away from home that week, or something. But then the second year went by, and the third, and the fourth... I have really missed her presence there, and her kids (who are BEAUTIFUL!) The email address I had for her bounces back, and online searches have yielded no results.
Recently I was going through some old papers and came across my records from the last year she was at camp. These records included a mailing address for her, so I am praying they haven't moved! I spent a good chunk of my letter updating her on the major events in my life she has missed, and asking about her kids who must be in middle school or high school by now (insane!) I really hope the letter reaches her, and that maybe I can hear from her in the future and reestablish that friendship. I think of her often, and wonder whatever happened to them, and hope that whatever it was wasn't something bad, that maybe priorities just changed. I guess we'll see... making extra sure this one has a return address on it.
Recently I was going through some old papers and came across my records from the last year she was at camp. These records included a mailing address for her, so I am praying they haven't moved! I spent a good chunk of my letter updating her on the major events in my life she has missed, and asking about her kids who must be in middle school or high school by now (insane!) I really hope the letter reaches her, and that maybe I can hear from her in the future and reestablish that friendship. I think of her often, and wonder whatever happened to them, and hope that whatever it was wasn't something bad, that maybe priorities just changed. I guess we'll see... making extra sure this one has a return address on it.
Letter #5 - Kent
I'm still not quite caught up, but tonight I made time for another letter. Tonight I wrote to my friend Kent, another BTS buddy. Kent and I are only about 6 months apart in age and he is devastatingly handsome. Tall, blonde, gorgeous. He is also an incredibly talented, competent, smart and confident guy. For any number of these reasons, I spent the greater part of the week in Scottsdale kind of avoiding him. Not entirely on purpose, but there was something about him that both intrigued me and intimidated me (not in the romantic sense, despite his looks... Austin and I were 2 years strong at that point!) The second to last day of the seminar, he and I ended up being partners for one of the exercises. I have no idea what the exercise was, I can't remember a single word we actually exchanged, but I remember from that point on I couldn't figure out why I had spent most of the week not talking to him. We shared several conversations and one rockin' dance (the memory of which is the only reason I can stand the song sexy back lol) between that exercise and the closing of the program, and I have tried hard to keep tabs on him ever since. He has built several extremely successful careers for himself (while simultaneously working on his degree) and is not hard to follow, which sometimes makes me wonder if I had even half the impact on him as he had on me. Sometimes when I reach out to him, I wonder if I'm just a slightly more familiar face in the crowd, or if he really remembers who I am. Some friends are like that.
Writing my letter tonight to Kent took me back to the fun of those last few days in Scottsdale, where everyone felt like family and was sad to think of the week coming to an end. He also is a person who keeps me inspired (and sometime jealous, I'm not gonna lie!) to be all I can be. After all, he's 6 months younger than me and has achieved so much in his life already... there's no reason I can't do the same if I put the time and energy into it! I doubt I'll hear back from him (though he may surprise me with a hi on facebook or something) but I hope I do. If not though, I still hope he keeps on achieving, and keeps sharing it with the world, coz I'll continue to follow his endeavours, and I'll continue to be inspired (and a little jealous) as he continues to soar.
Writing my letter tonight to Kent took me back to the fun of those last few days in Scottsdale, where everyone felt like family and was sad to think of the week coming to an end. He also is a person who keeps me inspired (and sometime jealous, I'm not gonna lie!) to be all I can be. After all, he's 6 months younger than me and has achieved so much in his life already... there's no reason I can't do the same if I put the time and energy into it! I doubt I'll hear back from him (though he may surprise me with a hi on facebook or something) but I hope I do. If not though, I still hope he keeps on achieving, and keeps sharing it with the world, coz I'll continue to follow his endeavours, and I'll continue to be inspired (and a little jealous) as he continues to soar.
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Letter #4 - Stephanie
Back in 2007 I was given an opportunity that I did not expect to be as influential in my life as it turned out to be. I attended Jack Canfield's 2007 Breakthrough to Success seminar in Scottsdale, AZ. I was supposed to go to "get a feel for the material" and ended up having an incredible experience. Part of that experience included meeting Stephanie.
Today's letter went to Stephanie. Steph is an amazingly strong and beautiful woman who I have come to admire very much. She attended BTS with her incredible husband, and the two of them sort of adopted me for the week, which was awesome. The three of us shared many meals, laughs, hugs, and even a few tears... and Stephanie and I share many evenings poolside just talking about life. They live in another state and so I haven't been able to see them in person since that week, but I keep them both very close in my heart. I was so excited writing my letter to her because even with the things in my life that aren't awesome right now (unemployment topping that list), I was able to share with her some of the successes I've had in achieving some of my goals that I set that week. Talking with Steph always forces me to focus on the positives in my life, and on the possibles. When I start doubting myself or my goals, she is one of the first to challenge me to focus on what IS attainable.
Letter #3 - Myrna
Last night I wrote my note to Bob, then was still awake enough (and not yet covered in cats) to write one more note before turning out the light. I decided to send letter #3 to Myrna, a long time family friend. Myrna was friends with my grandmother, so she's been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. She and my grandmother lived in the same building for awhile, and while Grandma was still alive, we saw Myrna pretty regularly. As time went on, after Grandma died, we saw less and less of Myrna, mostly due to Myrna's health slowly limiting her mobility (as far as getting herself places and not relying on transportation from others). I was really pleased to see her this past month at a church function and spent some time chatting with her.
Writing her letter brought back all kinds of memories of my grandmother, even though I didn't talk about her in my letter. Just remembering the apartment complex they both lived in, times spent there with my family, my cousin and I occasionally cleaning the place for her, or going over to take her shopping. It was nice to have some time to remember those moments rather than the less fun ones from later in her life.
Saturday, January 8, 2011
Letter #2 - Bob
I'm writing this pre-letter as I reflect on my evening an listen to "Broke Down" by Slaid Cleaves. I would have written the letter first, but it's much easier to do that nestled in bed than to haul my laptop in there (crap battery life), so I decided to post first. I already know what the experience will be like, and "Broke Down" is actually a pretty accurate reflection of that. I will be writing to my friend Bob. Bob is a musician friend I was blessed to meet through my husband's network. While Bob is older than me, he is not so much older that he should have 'expected' to lose his wife earlier this year... which he did in a devastatingly sudden way. Austin & I attended the memorial service and never have I experienced anything quite like it. The community was rocked by his wife's death and showed up in mass to mourn her loss along with him and their children. I've always felt close to Bob, even though we may not be the kind of friends who hang out together, or chat on the phone... he's just one of those people I've developed a strong attachment to, and I have tried very hard to be a support to him during the past several months as he processes the various stages of trying to make sense of what has become his life.
When I write to Bob, I often experience a deep feeling of compassion and love, and I try to ooze big hugs into each word. Writing him also puts me in a reflective frame of mind as I think about people in my life who I've lost, and people I love who are still with me. It puts me in a state of sympathy for his loss and grief, and one of gratitude that I still have my love and best friend with me.
I hope my card will bring a smile to his face, or at least let him understand that while we may not be "presence close" friends, I still keep him very close in my heart and think of him often.
When I write to Bob, I often experience a deep feeling of compassion and love, and I try to ooze big hugs into each word. Writing him also puts me in a reflective frame of mind as I think about people in my life who I've lost, and people I love who are still with me. It puts me in a state of sympathy for his loss and grief, and one of gratitude that I still have my love and best friend with me.
I hope my card will bring a smile to his face, or at least let him understand that while we may not be "presence close" friends, I still keep him very close in my heart and think of him often.
Friday, January 7, 2011
Letter #1 - Betty
Since it is clearly not 1 January, I have some catching up to do. Tonight I only had time to write one letter, but should be able to double up the next few days in order to get caught up. The first letter I chose to write to kick off my journey was to a dear friend named Betty. Betty has been in my life since I was about 5 years old. She is a member of my church and often would watch over my brother and I, or cat sit for us when our family was out of town for a few days.
I used to write to Betty at least once a year... she could at the very least always count on a Christmas card from me. Then life happened. My Christmas list grew larger, more overwhelming, my life became more cluttered, less focused on my address book... there's no real reason why Betty slowly dropped off my list of people I keep in touch with. She still calls my family on occasion to check in and see how life is treating us all, but she isn't much of a writer due to a sever arm issue she's had as long as I've known her. In fact, I'll be very surprised if I get a response from her, but I know she'll be glad to receive the letter! I included a few photos for her as well - a wedding photo, our family Christmas photo, and of course a photo of our cats (since she used to take care of the cats we had when we knew her, I figured she'd like to see the newbies!)
As I wrote my letter to Betty (it wasn't overly long, just the inside of a 3x5 notecard) I realised how much of my life she had missed out on because I stopped sending her news... and how much of her life I've missed because I stopped asking. I hope the letter finds her well, and I look forward to sending more letters this weekend.
I should probably clarify something... (in case I have friends and family reading this blog!) there isn't much rhyme or reason to who I choose to write for this project. Betty was one of the first names in my address book that I stopped at and thought "my gosh, I haven't heard from her in ages!" some of the others on my list for this weekend (yes, I made a list...) are friends who I send notes to more regularly and was just thinking of them, others are people who may receive my letter and think "Rachel who?"... as this project progresses I'm sure many of the people in my life will receive something or other. I will not duplicate contacts for this project either (unless it turns out I know fewer people than I think I do!) In short, if you know me, and you know about this project, and you do NOT receive anything from me this year... please, use it as an opportunity to send ME something! I am not trying to reject you, or make you feel bad.
Wishing you all much Happiness & Harmony... I'm off to bed!
I used to write to Betty at least once a year... she could at the very least always count on a Christmas card from me. Then life happened. My Christmas list grew larger, more overwhelming, my life became more cluttered, less focused on my address book... there's no real reason why Betty slowly dropped off my list of people I keep in touch with. She still calls my family on occasion to check in and see how life is treating us all, but she isn't much of a writer due to a sever arm issue she's had as long as I've known her. In fact, I'll be very surprised if I get a response from her, but I know she'll be glad to receive the letter! I included a few photos for her as well - a wedding photo, our family Christmas photo, and of course a photo of our cats (since she used to take care of the cats we had when we knew her, I figured she'd like to see the newbies!)
As I wrote my letter to Betty (it wasn't overly long, just the inside of a 3x5 notecard) I realised how much of my life she had missed out on because I stopped sending her news... and how much of her life I've missed because I stopped asking. I hope the letter finds her well, and I look forward to sending more letters this weekend.
I should probably clarify something... (in case I have friends and family reading this blog!) there isn't much rhyme or reason to who I choose to write for this project. Betty was one of the first names in my address book that I stopped at and thought "my gosh, I haven't heard from her in ages!" some of the others on my list for this weekend (yes, I made a list...) are friends who I send notes to more regularly and was just thinking of them, others are people who may receive my letter and think "Rachel who?"... as this project progresses I'm sure many of the people in my life will receive something or other. I will not duplicate contacts for this project either (unless it turns out I know fewer people than I think I do!) In short, if you know me, and you know about this project, and you do NOT receive anything from me this year... please, use it as an opportunity to send ME something! I am not trying to reject you, or make you feel bad.
Wishing you all much Happiness & Harmony... I'm off to bed!
finally... a mission!
I never make New Year's Resolutions. I am a goal setter and I work methodically through lists of things I'd like to accomplish on a daily basis... it keeps me sane and somewhat organised (my mother might snicker at that...) My lists and goals can be anything from tasks as mundane as "brush teeth, feed cats, make bed" to far more complex and long term goal like "pay off debt, meet Bon Jovi, go to Australia". Part of what helps me actually accomplish a lot of what I set out to do is that I tend to think of my lists as challenges to myself... if I can do everything on the list, I feel good about myself; I've risen to the challenge.
I'm sure most of you have seen blogs where the authors challenge themselves to a year-long journey in whatever area of life may interest them. There are blogs that post daily recipes, photos, movie trivia, scripture studies... bloggers who give themselves daily challenges like creating a new outfit, cooking a specific meal, budgeting their entire day's worth of meals, etc. I've always loved the concept of this, but never could come up with an idea of my own that I actually thought I stood half a chance of following through on.
In 2010, I got married. Along with all the ups and downs of preparing for marriage, planning and executing a wedding, and settling into the life of a newlywed, I have found myself reflecting a lot on who I am, where I come from, and the people who have shaped the person I've become. I come from a family of "corresponders" (on my mother's side). My grandmother loved sending and receiving mail, and all five of her daughters inherited her amazing ability to keep in regular touch with literally hundreds of friends and family over the years. With the advent of email and instant messenger, facebook and texting, mail has become less frequent for most. My family still regularly sends and receives mail, but in the past years my own ability to stay in touch with the people I care about (particularly those who don't live in my immediate geographic area) has suffered due to crazy schedules, changing priorities, smaller budgets, and, let's face it, laziness.
Tonight I was struck with inspiration. In an effort to improve my own relationships, and to share in a more personal way with those I care about, I am embarking on a journey of my own, to be documented in this blog. I am going to attempt to send one letter or postcard (snail mail, people... kickin' it old school!) to someone I know. The purpose of this blog will be to give me a space to reflect on the people in my life, as well as the experience as a whole. I hope those of you who stumble across this blog will appreciate it, and perhaps draw inspiration from it yourselves to find your own ways of reaching out to the important people in your lives.
To the critics (there are always critics): this is my journey, so I really don't care if you don't get it, if you think it's lame, or if you have no interest in my life and relationships. To you I say, find another blog to follow.
Since I am clearly already behind the ball a little, I'm going to try and catch up within the next few days sending some extra mail out in order to get current. Not sure if this will result in daily posts, or weekly summaries, or what exactly, it may change as the year progresses, but we shall see.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)