Letter #99 - Kerstin

I often marvel at how relationships work.  They come, they go, they strengthen and weaken... Kerstin is a friend who has ridden those waves in my life.  Our friendship has been stronger at times and weaker at others, yet we still stay connected, albeit indirectly at times.

Current events called Kerstin to mind when news of the shootings in Norway hit my twitter feed.  Kerstin and her family live in Oslo and I immediately prayed for their safety.  I'm happy to report they were unharmed, but it made me wonder about what causes us to drift so much as people, since I hadn't thought much of her in a year or more.  I realised I don't know anything about her family anymore, or even what she is doing for work, if anything.  I don't know what her husband does, I don't know how often they get to see her family in Germany, I don't know how old her kids are... and while I don't necessarily feel guilty for that (she doesn't know much about my life these days either), it urged me to write her and reconnect.

I have no idea if I will hear anything from her or not, I remember Kerstin was always much more of an in-person type, but we'll see.  If nothing else, I know I made an effort to reconnect with someone I consider a friend, no matter how far we may have drifted.

Letter #98 - Barbara

I have had the great blessing of living a life full of strong women to serve as role models and mentors to me.  I've mentioned some of them on this blog before, and today I'm writing about another one.  I recently picked up my notecards and pen again and wrote out a few letters... admittedly I'm not as far along on this project as I would have liked, so I'm going to need to step it up a bit... but I wrote out a few in a moment of sheer loneliness.  Having been unemployed for nearly 2 years, I spent a lot of time at home.  I wrote out a letter to Barbara sharing with her about my life and how much I miss living near her.  I also shared about my job search, which pleasantly came to an end the week after I sent her letter off, so now I'll have to send her a new one to fill her in on my good news!

Barbara recognised the writer in me at a young age.  When I was about 5 or 6 she gave me my first journal.  Little did I know how important that would become to me.  That specific journal may not have had every page filled, but I now own about a dozen other journals that do.  I am not a regular journaler.  In fact I find that I write the most when I am going through difficult times.  Writing seems to be a way for me to focus my thoughts and clear my head.  It's an excellent release for me at times.  In the process of getting married and moving out of my parents home I came across my stack of journals again and began reading through some of them.  It was amazing to me how vividly the events I described in their pages came flooding back to me as I read.

I have recently come to think of myself as a collector of memories.  I collect all kinds of momentos of people, places, events... and a large reason for that is my background.  I moved all the time as a kid and teen, and I think it played into my almost obsessive need to commemorate things.  As I grow older I try to detach myself more from the "stuff" and work on the memories themselves.  Stuff goes away after time, and memories hopefully stay for much longer.  Barbara helped give me a tool to hold onto those memories.

I am grateful for her influence on my life, and for her immensely beautiful smile and spirit.  I treasure her friendship and pray I'll be able to see her again soon!

Letter #97 - Diane

Diane was my stand-in mom when I was doing my undergrad.  When I graduated, I really meant to keep in better touch with her, but between our lives and schedules, we've drifted some.  I still love her a lot, and look forward to opportunities to catch up with her, but it's not often we get to do that, and often times when we catch up I find we're both referencing people, places and things that the other has no context for.

I've struggled a little in my own mind with the changes in our relationship.  At first I took it a little personally, we had been so close while I was there, and when I moved home it wasn't long before I wasn't getting checked in on anymore.  I slowly began to understand that it wasn't anything personal, it was just that she had new students to focus on.

I'm sure Diane will be glad to hear from me, but I have no idea if I will get anything back.  I just hope it brightens her day.

Letter #96 - Nancy

I've mentioned before how much I love my Tribe.  Nancy is one of my tribe members.  Geographically she lives the closest to me, and we've shared rides to and from class several times.  I'm several years older than her sons, but I think sometimes she looks at me like another one of her kids.  Nancy is awesome, a complete bohemian trapped in conservative middle class suburbia and as a result we have had some really fascinating discussions.

I've been wanting to send Nancy a note for awhile just to tell her how great I think she is, so this week I took that opportunity.  I sent some love and wished her luck on our upcoming assignments.  We don't have class next month, which I think both of us will miss from a social standpoint but to be honest, I'm welcoming the academic break... this last semester was a rough one.  I'm not sure Nancy's much of a writer, but I hope my note brings a smile to her face.  I'm hoping we can grab a meal together or some library time or something to make up for missing class together next month so I don't have to wait until September to see her again!

Letter #95 - Jaya

This summer I got to spend an entire afternoon with Jaya while I photographed her daughter's senior portraits.  Jaya is my parent's backyard neighbour, and she and her family have become good friends.  I wanted to write Jaya because she is such an incredibly thoughtful woman and always sending me greetings via my mother.  I miss getting to chat with her and her family as much as I used to since I got married and moved out of my parents home, but I hope that sending this note will let her know I still think of her often!

Letter #94 - Sharilyn

My mother is daughter #4 of 5 in her family.  Her oldest sister Sharilyn lives out of state and I don't get to see her much.  She is also a creative type, and very passionate about a lot of things in life.  She's also one of the people in my life that I'm bad at keeping in regular touch with, so I decided to send her a note.  I thanked her for the lovely birthday email she sent me and wished her a good summer.  I don't have a very close relationship with her, but wanted to make the effort to stay in touch, I know it bothers her that she doesn't have a closer relationship with her nieces and nephews because most of us haven't lived close to her for most of our lives so I try to be conscious of that and keep in better touch.

Letter #93 - Daphne

I was raised to believe that people can in fact stay in your life forever.  Not physically per se, and of course we all die eventually, but I come from a line of really great corresponders, as I've mentioned before.  Daphne is a woman who has been in my life since before I took my first breath.  She's the woman who delivered me.  I've been thinking about her lately, and in the course of this project that normally prompts me to dig out my stationary.

Daphne is much closer friends with my parents, but when she found out I was engaged she wrote me a beautiful letter of congratulations, reflecting on some of her memories of me and my family.  I decided to send her a note to just say hello and let her know she was on my mind.  We share a love of cats, so I told her about our kitties and sent some photos.  I love that I know the woman who delivered me.  I love that I can share my life with her and tell her about the things that are going on with me, and that it's meaningful to her.

I know that Dr. Daphne is pretty good about returning letters so I am hopeful that this letter will result in a letter in my mailbox in a few weeks.  We've had so much junk mail lately it would be really nice to get something personal :o)