Letter #50 - Evan

When my family moved to the Detroit area, I was devastated.  I was coming from an incredible experience living in Rotterdam, I missed Canada, and I was furious that my parents would dare uproot our family to come to a country that I didn't love (settle down all, it's grown on me).  I sobbed the entire 8 hour plane ride from Amsterdam to Detroit... I think the flight attendants were debating whether or not to call in social services on the chance that maybe I was being abducted... when my dad told them I was 14, they gave him a knowing look and walked away.  I was bound and determined to hate Michigan with a fiery passion, and had a plan to make my family pay for making me so miserable.  Then I met Evan like a week after the plane landed.  Damn him.

Evan quickly became one of my closest friends, and helped stave off some of my loneliness.  He would email me, call, we'd hang out sometimes, and saw each other every week at church.  He was my rock.  I don't think he ever realised this.  We stayed close through the next 3 years, including an incredible trip to Tahiti with a church group.  I still can't watch anything with Sean Connery in it without missing him desperately.  We were each others' prom dates, and then when he graduated high school he left me.  We never had a romantic involvement with each other, though sometimes I wonder if we weren't crushing on each other at opposite times.  When Evan moved to Arizona to start college I was sure he'd come back when he was finished with school.  After all, his family was in Detroit, and so was I, and we were such good friends.  He still lives in Arizona.  His family moved away, and here I still am.  He's been back to visit of course, and I've made it down there a couple of times as well to see him.

I don't think I think about how much I miss him normally.  The fact that I'm tearing up a little just writing this speaks to that I guess.  I miss laughing with him, I miss our shared sense of humour, our shared love for laser tag, our shared understanding of the joys and challenges of babysitting Brandon & Cameron... or Brett & Kelsy... or Tim.  I just miss him.  He gives great hugs, thoughtful gifts and even though it's tough to get him to be serious sometimes, I miss his insights on life and people.

Someday when I have an income again, I hope to take another trip to Arizona to spend some time with him.  I hope he knows how much I love him, how much I miss him, and how much his friendship has meant to me over the years... even if I suck at telling him that most of the time.